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Well this is a bit off topic, but important enough, i think, to discuss...

Yep..oh yes, i certainly have wondered where my next meal was going to come from and somehow, mysteriously, a "way" was always provided...was just thinking today about all the people who helped me along when i was a starving artist and there are people who still provide direction and course correction to me-- sometimes pushing -- sometimes pulling -- sometimes softly - sometimes roughly...

We can't assume that just because somebody has a few bucks today, that they've always had it. Can't assume because someone doesn' t have bucks today that they never had any. Money and wealth ebb and flow. It's a funny thing money and material possessisons. i only know three things about wealth:

1. i know i prefer to have sufficient money to pay for basic things needed to live comfortably and without stress of getting thrown out of the place i'm living and i know enough about money that i know i don't want or need inordinate amounts of money.

2. i know that just because someone has money does not mean they are not "poor" in other ways like spiritually and emotionally. And that kind of poverty is really horrific.

3. I absolutely know and i've tested it many, many times..that when you give some of what you have away, you get many times more than what you gave away. But i realize that it's really hard to convince people who need money, to take a little bit of what they already have even in their worst moment of need and give it away to someone who needs it even more. It's counterintuitive to think "Gee.....i don't have enough money to pay my rent in a few days and only have enough food in the place for today and tomorrow. Lights could be turned off in 10 days and i need shoes repaired -- i have $63.18 cents cash (including my emergency coin collection), so let me take 15.00 of that and find three people who need to eat today and feed them!" If people only realized that doing just that would get their financial money pump primed..but when you don't have much, the natural inclination is to hold on to what you have with a death grip. I did that for a long time..until i learned how to get money to start to flow in by giving. (actually i've been down to like 7$ and change and have gotten the pump going with a gift of two dollars to someone. That was the worst of it and i remember that after doing so, a neighbor appeared at my door with a big fish that he caught that day. A friend of mine who was also starving and i fixed that fish and i had a bag of black beans that never seemed to get soft enough to eat and we ate from that fish for days and days. Then i got a response from president Carter tot he telegram i had sent him and was put in touch with some agency and little by little inched my way forward.)

..i agree with you, Amy, that this soon-to-be-mother's friend really does have a conscience and she's ready and willing to put herself at some risk to get her friend and baby to the hospital.

This makes me realize that i just am not as evolved spiritually as maybe i should be as it relates to people i don't already have a duty to protect and serve (i.e., husband, parents, clients). i feel my first responsibility is to all the people depending on me to have a clear mind and able to concentrate and find creative solutions to their problems, and also to my 90 year old parents who could need me at any second, to be functioning at top capacity and not worn down by insomnia, itching, stress, etc.

i make this decision often...if its flu season, i don't go to the big post office where i see many people spitting on the ground and coughing without covering their mouths. i just can risk being sick.

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